Monday, February 19, 2007

You Will Buy This!

The nuttiest and most frustrated saleswoman on earth works at a Macy's fragrance counter. (I check in with her once in a while because she is such a total freak ) She refuses to give samples unless there is a purchase. I noticed that she makes a huge deal out of giving customers one chocolate coin if they buy some of the expensive trendy crap she is pushing. I watch her drive possible customers away with her abrasive attitude and wonder what her home life is like. I like to go and ask her inane questions, spray trendy stuff into the air, and not buy anything. I like to push all of her buttons.
I once almost purchased a bottle of Bulgari's Blu Notte from her, but she twitched and snapped "Ack, THAT!" she made a snorty sound. "That is not popular, that is going to be discontinued!"
I smiled. "OK then." at that moment I decided I would never buy anything from her.

She pointed to a bottle of Brittney Spears Fantasy, "Now THIS is what you should buy." Her eyes glowed red for a few seconds.

Anyway, she told me that all of the men who stop by her counter purchase stuff that smells like apple tart, vanilla cake or eggnog for their ladies. And she smugly lectured me on the value of knowing what men want to smell on a woman. (food and more food apparently ) She must have thought from my blank stare that I was ready to absorb more of her wisdom and so tried to fast talk me into buying an 'apple pie' scent. "Guaranteed to have your man salivating!" She went on and on until a friend that I had planned to meet up with at the fragrance counter interrupted us.
My friend, who has only a passing interest in scent, strode up, ignored the saleswoman completely, began talking to me about our lunch plans, and reaching way behind the counter grabbed a fistful of the chocolate coins from a dish. The saleswoman gasped but my friend and I were already walking off, and I could picture the tiny angry woman behind us, fuming among her perfumes. 

The Brittney Spears scents boast notes like Cupcake Accord, Black Vanilla and Creme Brulee. I just picture the chemist in his lab, working on the sweetest possible version of a cupcake with thick frosting note. I find that I fully enjoy the amusing 'dark side' of my little perfume world.

If you want to sample some truly fun & thought provoking scents, I would look to those who really know the business,
Christopher Gable & Christopher Brosius.
*DEMETER Fragrances (Christopher Gable) has moderately priced perfumes called Sugar Cookie, Waffles, and Vanilla Cake Batter which I must admit smell very good. And they are reasonably light so after awhile the only person who knows you smell like a sugar cookie is the person nuzzling your neck. Demeter also has scents called Thunderstorm, Laundromat, Play-Doh, and Dirt. It is fascinating to sample all of their scents, just for the smell of it. (a fun idea for party favors.)
*CB I Hate Perfume is a perfume shop run by Christopher Brosius. Besides creating personal scents for customers he meets, Brosius makes fragrances called In the Library, Gathering Apples, Just Breathe, Burning leaves, and many more.